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You are invited to a screening of the documentary, “The Tiny Little Box, a Documentary about Depression” at the Small Steps, QianYongKang Hutong44. DID YOU KNOW: 7% of the general population is experiencing a major episode of depression at this moment. Depression can be treated with appropriate anti-depressants and psychotherapy. Your actions as a family member, friend, or colleague towards people with depression can be very influential to their recovery. “The Tiny Little Box” documents four people’s experiences with depression. They share their stories about the onset of depression, recall what their emotional state was like during, and also talk about their recovery. Two mindfulness practitioners explore their experiences with mindfulness practice, which is heralded as an effective way to cope with, and also to aid in, the depression recovery process. The director of New Life Foundation also tells his story of how mindfulness changed his life. This documentary has been screened in Thailand and Beijing and we invite you to join in and engage with us on a topic that needs more public attention. Through talking about mental health struggles, we take the first step towards healing. Location: QianYongkang Hutong, 44 前永康胡同44号，东城区，北京 RSVP: info@candlex.cn. Space is limited. Leave your name and your phone number in your registration email. Fee: free Time: March 27th Sunday, 2016, 19:00-20:30 We look forward to movie night with you! #depression #TheTinyLittleBox #Beijing

On March 13th 2016, the CandleX team visited a Psychiatric Group Home, Sunshine Home, in the outer suburbs of Beijing. Sunshine Home houses patients who have already been discharged from hospital but still need care and assistance. Sunshine Home assists patients with the rehabilitation process. Sunshine Home invited us to visit so that we could learn about the facilities and services available for patients, as well as to gain an understanding of the gaps in available resources and resultant challenges faced by the Sunshine Home carers. We were moved by how passionate and dedicated the caring director and staff is. Director Yang said that, “Everyone here is respected and acknowledge of their ability to contribute to society. What we do here is create a safe environment and give the patients opportunities to regain basic life skills.” Most patients here are long term residents with chronic psychiatric disorders, including depression and schizophrenia. Family visits some once a week, while others have been left alone. The majority of patients face serious financial difficulties due to their lack of capacity to work. This presents a serious challenge for Sunshine Home because most patients are not able to pay for the assistance that they receive. Patients are still fed and cared for even if they are unable to pay and Sunshine Home is always trying to improve the quality of the service provided. It was clear that the patients receive really good care. They were all relaxed and calm and the staff know each of their likes and dislikes well. The patients follow a routine and they each have their own roles and responsibilities to attend to during the day. Some help with cleaning the street and home while others act as salesmen at the home’s corner store. Twice a week sees the much love event “Crazy Bake”. Staff and patients work together to bake breads such as bagels and challah. International schools and stores in Beijing purchase this bread, and this helps to supplement Sunshine’s Home income. Patients also learn how to make homemade soap and at least one day a week is dedicated to this fragrant project. At Sunshine Home, the patients are not judged and their skills and abilities are valued. They are given the opportunity to use their skills and to feel capable and productive. This acceptance and care leads to Sunshine Home feeling like home those who are suffering and may not find such a place elsewhere. If you would like to volunteer at Sunshine Home or provide financial assistance please email CandleX at info@candlex.cn and we will assist you in initiating contact. #volunteer #Beijing #SunshineHome #mentalhealth

On 17th of May, 2015, with the full support from Moishe House Beijing, CandleX was honored to be with the friends from Moishe House, where Xiaojie QIN shared her personal story. It started with an educational video on bi-polar disorder, followed by real life case of Xiaojie. We shared the symptoms of bi-polar disorder, and how it’s related to the environment and biological condition, as well as what we can do to improve the situation. We were happy to see that audience started to open up during our Q&A session, and one particular participant came to us for more info. We strongly believe that, just by acknowledging and accepting that we do get unwell mentally in life, and seeing it as normal, it would significantly reduce the inward aggression, and self-blame that most people with depression experience. This is what our public sharing intend to contribute to as well. #Beijing #China #mentalhealth

BEIJING – On January 4, 2020, David Schmidt (pictured below), an advocate for mental health and a passionate supporter of CandleX, passed away. Throughout his life, David traveled around the world and spent many years in China. In 2019, Xiaojie visited David in Tecumseh, Michigan, USA, and seized on the chance to ask David’s brother, Don, about his personal experience caring for and supporting David when he was suffering from depression. You can watch the full interview here. The interview with Don touches upon a number of key topics of universal value to our understanding of depression. It offers us an insight into two different but interrelated experiences of mental illness, i.e. the perspective of the person suffering, and the perspective of a loved one trying to help the sufferer. The former is introduced to us directly by David, through his own personal experience. The latter point of view is embodied and presented by his brother Don. The following points are touched upon in the video: · the personal and environmental factors that may contribute to the onset of depression · some useful coping strategies to adopt when in depression, especially when moving abroad and/or back home · how to care for and support someone with depression · how to take care of yourself when helping someone who is struggling with a mental illness The two different experiences provide bidirectional insights – from the inside to the outside and vice versa – that could facilitate better communication and increase understanding between both actors. In terms of recommended coping strategies when suffering from depression – both abroad and back home – suggestions include: · Being realistic, and not falling prey to expectations that are too high – from yourself as well as from the surrounding environment. · Remember that putting too much pressure on yourself can easily result in feelings of disappointment and frustration. It is much better to approach challenges step by step · Seeking help and support from relatives and loved ones, if possible · Socializing and reaching out to a local support group · Trying to better communicate with loved ones in order to decrease stress and avert misunderstanding The part on caring and supporting someone with depression is led by Don, and exemplified by David’s sister Mary. She helps us sketch the following takeaways: · Listen, listen, listen, as sometimes doing nothing but simply listening is both the only and best thing one can do · If possible, take care of some simple yet essential daily tasks such as cooking meals, doing laundry, going to the doctor, etc · Focus less on problem-solution dynamics and more on open, compassionate and sincere communication Finally, Don warmheartedly explains how he tackled the stresses and strains he experienced when trying to help David through his hardest times – the fear, anger, and anguish deriving from the sense of hopelessness and vulnerability Don witnessed and had to deal with. When prompted to reflect on self-care strategies when helping someone with depression, Don suggests: · Looking for a sympathetic ‘crutch’ – a friend, partner or relative ­– to confide in · Creating a supportive network to provide a ‘refill’ when spiritually and physically drained · Accepting your powerlessness at times in order to control feelings of frustration and inadequacy · Working to maintain a sense of mental balance You can learn more about David’s struggle with depression in his own words here. CandleX’s Resources Are you or a friend in a Crisis? Crisis Support Your questions on mental health | CandleX Classroom https://www.candlex.cn/classroom Depression stories from our community members (both adults and teens) CandleX Column | Community Writing https://www.candlex.cn/community-writing Pretreatment CandleX Wechat Groups all ages, add our admin: niama_elazzab for 15-22 year old, add our admin: amaraprenderyya Peer Support Group biweekly meetings and biweekly hangout

Author: Jane Written in : 2021 The biggest “surprise” came without any hints. That day was just another normal day. It began with our daily breakfast routine; my mom prepared eggs, bread, apples, and grapes, as I prepared the coffee. My brother came as he usually did without any prompts. As usual, I was the first one to talk. I enjoyed talking with my family, but I typically spoke about myself, my feelings, and my thoughts. My brother usually hesitates to make any comments or is reluctant to give feedback, especially on topics that don’t interest him. The day before, I had gone to an event about embracing our vulnerability and taking risks. To my surprise, one-third of the attendees that day talked about their own struggles with depression, not being able to enjoy life and work, and also their helplessness to speak about the truth with friends and family. As I listened attentively to the stories, it was hard for me to relate to them wholeheartedly; maybe I didn’t empathize properly. At the breakfast table that morning, I retold what I saw, heard, and felt at the event, and then without any consciousness, turned my head towards my brother and asked, “It was so unbelievable, women and youth are really having a bad time these days. How about you? Do you have depression?” This time without hesitation, he said, “Yes,” and no more. The world froze in that second; tears rushed out of my eyes. I felt lost, suddenly filled with fear, sadness, and worry. Before my tears fell from my eyes, I cried out. My mom was beside me, I was not even aware of her reaction (maybe I was not brave enough to look at her face at that moment), and I started to talk. This time, I spoke about my surprise and apologized for not knowing what my brother was going through. After a short while, my brother continued and told me he had suffered from severe depression for years, and he knew how to deal with it properly with the doctor’s instruction and medication. I kept apologizing, but he said calmly, “You don’t have to apologize, not about you. I don’t hide now because I am okay with it.” What he said soothed me, and I stopped crying and began to pay attention to my mom. She said nothing but looked worried. Breakfast didn’t last long, as we all had plenty of work to do that day. My bother left home; first, my mom started cleaning up the table immediately. I could feel my feet again, and adjusted my tone, and tried to comfort my mom, saying that depression is common nowadays, we shouldn’t worry too much. After all, we believe in medical science, and we believe in my brother. The days following that breakfast, I searched my memories for clues about my brother, such as why I always felt that he was in a low mood and unhappy, with little interest in others and talking to me. I thought about how he preferred to stay alone in his room for a long time, how he always looked tired and refused to go outside, how he seemed so detached from the surroundings. Now I see that I was too good at justifying his actions and telling myself he was just an introverted person with a different personality than me. We had a different mind, and I never thought about depression, not a second! How terrible, how shocking! I was filled with regret! The only positive thing my mind told me was that nothing “worse” happened before now; everything was just fine! （一切都是最好的安排！） I was surprised that my mom wasn’t that concerned; she said it was not a big problem (indeed, she had seen worse in her life than this). Maybe my mom had a much “bigger heart” than me; maybe she was too old to care about emotional suffering anymore; I did not ask her. More importantly, she is very open, positive, and supportive—she went on with her life as usual. She still goes to the market at nearly the same time as she always did to buy daily goods and cook us meals, especially the Happy Friday Dinner. I am more attentive to my brother’s feelings and enjoy buying flowers for his room and our living room, inviting him to go outdoors with us. He doesn't resist anymore; we have captured the beautiful spring of Beijing during our weekly outdoor explorations with our mom. Thanks to my brother’s open and honest discussion about his depression, our entire family learned more about self-care, caring for each other, and enjoying life. After all, everyone has low moments, disappointments, and frustrations. You name it; they are part of our life, accepting and understanding are all we need. If you are unsure of how to support friends and family who are going through depression, check out our pre-treatment guidance project. With the funds raised from our monthly dog event and monthly donation, we are now able to offer a few sessions with 70% cost overed. You can also choose to join our monthly donation group by scan the QR code below. CandleX’s Resources Are you or a friend in a Crisis? Crisis Support Your questions on mental health | CandleX Classroom https://www.candlex.cn/classroom Depression stories from our community members (both adults and teens) CandleX Column | Community Writing https://www.candlex.cn/community-writing A CandleX production on Depression The Tiny Little Box | A Documentary on Depression CandleX Wechat Groups all ages, add our admin: Zingyzinger for 15-22 year old, add our admin: amaraprenderyya Peer Support Group biweekly meetings

Have you signed up to our online course club yet? It’s pretty simple: we all sign up to take a free course together and go deeper into the ideas in sessions facilitated by licensed therapists. The course is called “Anxiety, Depression and CBT” and it is available on FutureLearn. Scan the QR code to learn more and sign up. In line with the topic of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy or CBT, we are publishing a piece this week by Alison, a Chinese-born 18-year-old 11th grader at Dana High School in the United States. We hope you enjoy her piece about how CBT helped her. CBT opened my eyes to see the person that I truly am without the thoughts that used to suppress my self-esteem by stirring up difficult emotions in me. I’ve always been the “perfect” child in almost every aspect of life, until I came to the US for high school, where I was hit by a great sense of failure. At the beginning of high school, I found that I wasn’t doing as well as before both academically and socially. Although I understood the challenging nature of adjusting to a new environment while navigating my student life, the overachieving part of myself wasn’t satisfied with any slips or mistakes. My worst critic became a voice in my head; it blamed even a slight lowering in my grade on “my stupid brain that can’t even process the most basic information in class”, and attributed the difficulty in making friends at first on me being “so unpopular that no one wants to hang out with me”. My self-esteem lowered with each word that the voice was telling me, yet I listened with an attentive ear, believing that I deserve to suffer because of how worthless I was without the great achievements and people’s compliments that I used to experience back in China. By the time I connected with my therapist, I was already a mess, anxious about what I’d do with “my life of failure” and accusing myself of being the cause of every unfortunate thing that has happened to me. My therapist, however, always helps me to identify my inaccurate thoughts that I took for granted as the truth. For example, I was once so ashamed about not being able to hold a conversation with a new friend that I believed that my social skills have declined. My therapist pointed out that in this case, guided by shame, I went down the path of emotional reasoning. She explained that one event doesn’t tell the whole story, so just because I experienced an awkward moment, doesn’t mean that I was doing worse socially than I did before. Introducing me to CBT helped me to recognize that instead of serving me, my intrusive thoughts can often militate against my well-being. One practice of CBT that helped me immensely was writing down my intrusive thoughts, the emotions that stem from them, and my consequent reaction. Through regular practices, CBT took off the blindfold made of unhelpful feelings and helped me to become more aware of my thoughts, and I was finally able to dig deeper into my fundamental beliefs that gave rise to unhelpful thoughts like the one aforementioned. For me, after all, everything came down to my underlying core belief that I needed to do everything perfectly, or else I would be a failure. As time went on, and I gradually adjusted to studying at a new school, I found that I am still the person that I was before— a learning enthusiast and that quirky one who attracts like-minded people to become friends with me. Throughout this process of rediscovering myself, CBT has been crucial in helping me to be mindful of my thoughts and beliefs and encouraging me to engage in more positive self-talk. Our experiences are not what happens to us, but rather what we think has happened to us and what we do about it. So, I sincerely hope more people can benefit from learning about CBT, and break free from the cage of unhelpful thinking patterns. CandleX’s Resources Access the CandleX archive on depression and mental health Are you or a friend in a Crisis? Crisis Support CandleX on Twitter www.twitter.com/CandleX_Beijing/ Stories and writing from our community https://www.candlex.cn/blog/category/Community%20Writing Support Group Support Group Sign Ups

Katelyn (pseudo name) was born in 2002 to a Chinese family in Beijing. She first moved to Canada with her family when she was 3, and since then moved back and forth between China and Canada a few times. She now lives in Beijing and has participated in our teens program since 2020. She bravely shared her story of a time that she moved to Canada again at the age of 13, where she attended a French boarding high school. Author: Katelyn (pseudo name) Written in 2020 “You cannot have depression, as it would take a minimum of three months before one develops it.” Those were the words of the woman in front of me, as I was going through half a box of tissues to wipe away my tears. It had been three weeks since I started grade 8 in a French catholic boarding school. I was 14, and one year had passed since I returned to Canada. I had already been held back a year, as I was forced to complete an immigration program in French. I was determined to make up for this lost year and do my best to fit in. I remember how I first walked into the school cafeteria, subconsciously searching the crowd for faces like mine, but I failed to recognize any people of Asian heritage. I was the only person of color in my grade of 300 students who was actually an immigrant. The three other POCs were all adopted by white families. I felt intimidated but strangely excited about the challenge of introducing all these people to my culture. “But… but what could possibly be wrong with me?” I cried, struggling to get the sentence out. I don’t remember much from the school counseling session other than feeling crushed and misunderstood. I specifically requested it to be in English, so I would at least have some sense of comfort and familiarity. Ever since arriving, I had tried my best to maintain perfect grades and a positive attitude towards my new classmates despite feeling isolated and sometimes being mocked. Every Friday when I went back home, I would cry and beg my mom to not drive me back to school the following week. I didn’t get physically bullied and I could sense there wasn’t much malicious intent behind the teasing. It was just extremely ignorant and dumb. One time, I remember teaching some other students Chinese. A teacher overheard me and commented it sounded like “zoo animal language.” A few more weeks passed by, and I began to suffer academically. Focusing in class became much harder. My mind was preoccupied with thoughts like, “No one likes you here” or “Nothing will make up for the fact that you’re not white, rich and pretty”. I always held myself up to next to impossible standards when it came to grades, and I couldn’t imagine what I’d lose if I wasn’t at least a good student. Unfortunately, all of that was now slipping away, too. I wasn’t myself anymore. People no longer saw me as extroverted, witty and competent. Instead, I did every assignment half-heartedly and spent my breaks alone, crying in the bathroom. The hope that I would eventually be accepted as one of them but still somehow stand out had long vanished. My 14-year-old brain couldn’t understand the inequality and injustice I experienced, but it became clear to me that either I had to completely change or the environment had to. I stopped going to school altogether. “You’re so weak-minded! How can you face me like this! You’ve become a disgrace.” The words of my father ringed in my head. It had been months since I last went to school, or ate with my family, or woke up during the day, or felt like a decent human being. I thought I would only be taking a short break, but I’d never felt this exhausted in my whole life. I told my mom I wanted to go back to my old school, where it was culturally diverse and I still had friends, and I did. This is a story of an international family, which is characterized by the family moving countries every few years. Often times, the moving decisions are decided by the parents, where the children in the family just tag-along. Although children have to move with their parents, it’s important to have a discussion with your children and let them participate in choosing the new school environment that they are going to be in. The decision process should be a collaborative one. Teenagers are at the developmental age where their relationships with their peers are of crucial importance. Culture shock can happen at different levels, but when there’s strong cultural discrimination at a new school both amongst students and faculty, it could put your children at a high risk of depression and anxiety. It is vital to monitor their adjustment to the new environment based on their emotional wellbeing. This can be done by having regular conversations about their concerns, fears, as well as new learning and achievements in school. We would like to remind parents who have always had high expectations for their children that communicating to your children the following information would make your communication with your children more open, honest, and effective. It would also provide them a space where they can go to get support if they do need it. First, everyone fails and it’s normal. Embrace all the feelings that come along with the failure, such as insecurities, frustration, sadness, disappointment, or even anger. Second, when you fail, I am here to support you, I still believe in you and I love you nonetheless. Lessons we take from failures that are valuable, and we can learn from them together. CandleX’s Resources Are you or a friend in a Crisis? Crisis Support Your questions on mental health | CandleX Classroom https://www.candlex.cn/classroom Depression stories from our community members (both adults and teens) CandleX Column | Community Writing https://www.candlex.cn/community-writing A CandleX production on Depression The Tiny Little Box | A Documentary on Depression CandleX Wechat Groups all ages, add our admin: Zingyzinger for 15-22 year old, add our admin: amaraprenderyya Peer Support Group biweekly meetings

We shared Lilian’s story last month of her experiences with bullying when she transferred to an international kindergarden in China. Lilian, born in Fujian China, is now studying at Madeira High School in Virginia, the USA. Today, we want to share her story on bullying in high school when she first moved from China to the US. Lilian’s now actively involved in mental health advocacy work and is part of our Teen’s Mental Health Program. We hope that her story could bring teachers, parents and school’s attention on improving the environment for teens, and support new students better in navigating through changes. Xiaojie Editor in Chief When the plane touched the ground at Dulles airport in the USA, my mind was occupied by the wild visions I had of living abroad during high school. No more practice exams, and no more teachers forcing me to study things I don’t like. I was excited to focus on activities that I liked, like joining many clubs and making lots of friends. The reality was different from my dream. Coming from a middle school in the normal Chinese education system, I didn’t have much in common with my peers who were local or came from international schools. I found it difficult to fit into the cliques at school. I didn’t get acquainted with my peers until one day I asked some of them to have some late-night snacks in my room. That night proved to be disastrous for me. When everyone was ready to return to their dorms to sleep, two people in my grade had a conflict with some upperclassmen in the hallway. The residential assistants asked me what had happened, and I told them about it, hoping they could solve the conflict. Rather than resolve the conflict, the residential assistants became involved in the fight and I became the target. I didn’t realize the severity of the event until I received the first notification from my phone. Then, the second, the third… Bombarding notifications showing that everyone left the group chat—except for me. The notifications came in like a flood. As I stared at the screen, my mind went blank. Just as suddenly, I realized I was being left out on purpose. The next thing that came to me was rumors. It should have been easy to prove my innocence, but it wasn’t. By the time I heard about the whispers, they’d already grown into a “fact” many people believed. I had tried to speak up once during lunch. I wanted to talk to one girl first. But before I had a chance, I saw the person who spread the rumors coming toward me, staring at me. I immediately gave up. There was an invisible hand covering my mouth tightly. No voice could break through that firm cover, and nobody listened. I suppressed my feelings to avoid crying in front of the crowd. When I tried to talk to my classmates, they wouldn’t reply. Everyone was talking to each other and laughing. I was like an invisible person at lunch table. I sat there awkwardly with two empty seats beside me. To avoid being in an embarrassing situation again, I kept my mouth shut unless someone else talked to me. I began to have the feeling of loneliness and believed that everyone avoided me on purpose. After a month, the situation escalated further. I ended up being questioned and threatened by a small group of people in the school cafeteria. I said sorry again and again for things I didn’t even think I did. They just left and didn’t accept my apology. At that moment I felt exhausted and empty. I wanted to find a place to escape so badly. I thought of going back home for a while. I even told my parents about what happened, and they agreed. Yet, I hesitated. I chose to study abroad and I didn’t want to give up so quickly. I knew my parents wanted to help, and we were messaging every day. I was afraid to call them because I was my classmates would eavesdrop on me. My parents gave me lots of advice. They told me to be strong and to talk with the people who treated me badly. But none of these really works since I had already tried all of them. Fixing the relationship was impossible, and I felt resigned. Changes in my physical and mental stage happened, even though they weren’t immediately apparent. After the night I got kicked out of the group, I felt it was more difficult to fall asleep. I was so traumatized that when I lay on my bed and gazed at the ceiling, I had flashbacks of my past childhood experiences of being bullied. I thought the insomnia would end quickly, but it did not. I used to lay on my bed for hours and couldn’t fall asleep. When I managed to fall asleep, I would wake up several times a night. The sleep deprivation left me exhausted. I was tired and often fell asleep during the daytime. The emptiness I felt made my heart ache. The stronger the sense of loneliness I felt, the more reluctant I was to talk to other people. Even though I wanted to make new friends, I was worried about others’ thoughts about me and I did not trust my abilities to make new friends. My anxiety related to interpersonal communication worsened at that time. I began to think that I was not as good as my peers. For a long time, I didn’t know what to do. The hopelessness was eating me alive snip by snip. Sticking to a daily schedule was the key for me to not becoming overly immersed in my negative feelings. I tried to fill every time slot so that I wouldn’t have too much time to let my mind wander. Instead of locking myself in the restroom during breaks, I signed up for several clubs and forced myself to show up. I also found that after running, I felt a little bit more relaxed. I exhausted myself on purpose by running every day in the afternoon. Most of the time, running helped me fall asleep much easier. In the evening, I filled my time by doing extra work outside of school and even planned to transfer to another school. As I became busier, I finally became friends with some of the day students. When I returned to the dorm at night, the loneliness came back to me. I was still uncomfortable with the situation I was in; however, things were improving a lot. I was lucky that I realized that there were still some people who trusted me, but I wished I have more support. I remember some people noticed my social isolation. Several of them had come to me and told me that they trusted me. Some of them were even close friends with the people who hurt me. Since every one of them came to me alone, I never know how many people they meant when they said “we.” I wanted to be friends with them, but I didn’t dare to step forward, and neither did they. I thought my life might be better if one of them would be a mediator of this conflict, or would spend some time with me. Still, I was so deeply thankful for their kind acts. They made me believe I wasn’t alone and there were people willing to help me. It took me about one year and a half to be fully recovered from this traumatic experience. After I came back home, I felt better and better. I could fall asleep, I was no longer anxious. It was like my true self came back to me little by little. Instead of pretending to be happy, I eventually felt happiness like I used to do. However, every time I’m in a situation that reminds me of what happened in the past, my emotions suddenly breakdown and I can’t control my tears from pouring down. This led me to finally going to a counselor. Now, I can look back at my experience and appreciate it. I view this experience as an opportunity for personal growth instead of a sad story. When facing difficulties, I now think positively. I believe in my ability to overcome difficult times, but I am also prepared for failure because I know the setbacks always result in comebacks. Self-care became part of my life. I pay attention to the beautiful things around me, whether it’s a warm breeze or fluffy cat. I found the pace for my life that I make little progress every day. The biggest gain for me is to be confident. I trust myself as a person and nobody other than me can define who I am. The experience of bullying can have a long-lasting effect on a person's mental health. Whether verbal bullying, rumor-mongering, or social isolation, it usually leaves the recipient with complex negative emotions, ranging from intense self-doubt to feelings of loneliness and frustration. Moreover, bullying often occurs in adolescence, when our sense of self-identity is not yet fully developed. This can often have a long-term impact on our self-esteem and social experiences later on. When faced with bullying, it's important to try to maintain a sense of order in daily life, seek help from family members, or seek counseling, as Lilian does. For parents, teaching children how to deal with bullying is the first step in protecting them. For example, role-playing school bullying scenarios at home to teach children how to express themselves assertively, going over ways to report to school staff for support if necessary, giving children more support, praise and recognition to protect their self-esteem, and helping kids build other relationships outside of school are all great ways to start. While bullying can be a traumatic experience, many, like Lilian, transform the traumatic experience into an impetus for post-traumatic growth. If you have ever encountered bullying, learning how to deal with it may be an important life lesson. CandleX’s Resources Are you or a friend in a Crisis? Crisis Support Your questions on mental health | CandleX Classroom https://www.candlex.cn/classroom Depression stories from our community members (both adults and teens) CandleX Column | Community Writing https://www.candlex.cn/community-writing A CandleX production on Depression The Tiny Little Box | A Documentary on Depression CandleX Wechat Groups all ages, add our admin: Zingyzinger for 15-22 year old, add our admin: amaraprenderyya Peer Support Group biweekly meetings

In Beijing, we have a growing concern for women’s health in particular on depression and anxiety. To address that, Beijing Women’s Network hosted the “Healthy Living Series: Depression and Anxiety for Modern Beijing Women” community talk at Bookworm joined by Beijing Mindfulness Center, CandleX and professional counselor Ms Iris Ran Liu. It was Wednesday evening, September 14th, and the skies were covered in an all too familiar gray blanket that is infamous in Beijing. However tonight it was not the pollution creating the haze, these were clouds. The day was cool and a lovely breeze wafted through the streets. From the windows of the Bookworm in Sanlitun, it was the kind of weather that made you think of autumn. Then, without warning the skies burst open and a downpour soaked the streets and washed the city clean. It was fitting as inside the Bookworm another downpour was occurring. Beijing Women’s Network came equipped with the tools to blow the dam on people’s fear and pain when it comes to talking about depression. And, like the storm outside, a cleansing was taking place within the four walls of the Bookworm. Qin Xiaojie (founder of CandleX), Iris Ran Liu (Mental Health Counselor at Agape Counseling Center) , and Dalida Turkovic(founder of Beijing Mindfulness Center) were on hand to talk about the challenges of dealing with suffering from depression, helping others who are suffering from the debilitating illness, and to provide support and a safe environment for tackling the problem in a way that is not really seen in China. There were questions from the audience as well as some courageous admissions of those suffering from depression; they expressed a sense of being lost in a storm and in need of a lighthouse to head toward. The discussion covered depression from a number of angles, including one that is all too common to inhabitants of Beijing; the environment. Several people in the audience expressed the fact that China (and Beijing specifically) had a huge problem with an availability to places that are full of green, natural, unspoiled life and how this lack of refuge in nature can contribute greatly to depression. As always, the option of possible solutions offered covered a myriad of things such as doing yoga (which CandleX conducts a rooftop session of weekly), eating healthy foods to give our bodies the proper fuel and energy, providing an open ear to those that are in need of not just being heard but really listened to and other methods. It was stressed several times, and it must always be remembered, that every person is different and no one solution exists for how to battle the pervasive foe that is depression. This is because depression never looks the same for each person. It is chameleon like in its attacks and comes at each person in a different way. CandleX rooftop yoga on Sundays By the time the evening ended, the rain had stopped and the air outside was refreshing and full of potential. The inside once again mirrored the outside. There were more smiles exiting than entering, connections were made, new ports in the storm were marked on people’s maps and hope had been injected into the room. It’s important to remember that with depression, you are not alone, you can survive and you can emerge victorious. It’s a sinister villain that relies on our solitude, our shame and our fear. Without these sources of fuel, depression has a much more difficult time surviving. If you don’t suffer from depression, you almost certainly know someone who does, even if you don’t know it. Take some time to really listen to your friends and family and those around you. Hear them and see them. And if you do suffer from depression, please seek help. You can also learn more about depression by visiting our “Classroom” column, as well as reading other people’s story from our “My Story with Depression” column, where Beijing international community share their experiences. Moreover, you can come to our bi-weekly peer support group for people with depression, severe anxiety and mania. #Beijing #China #depression #anxiety

Hello there! Here’s the latest from our brave young people writing the letter they have always wanted to write, as part of our Community Writing Project sharing stories from our community. Our writer this week is Mary, a Beijing-based high schooler, who wrote a letter “to her parents” about a recent moving experience she had with music. If you haven’t already, don’t forget to follow us on Twitter at @CandleX_Beijing To my dearest parents, It's been quite a while since the last time I wrote to you. Last week, I attended an online session called “anonymous pen-pals”, where students write letters anonymously. It turned out to be great. Many students got to express their feelings freely. However, some students still couldn’t express themselves well and were still hiding their inner feelings deep inside their minds. My best friend Catherine is one of these students. On the last school day of sophomore, I saw Catherine walk straight out of the classroom during class time without the teacher’s permission. Watching her walking out of the room, I knew it was the bipolar disorder that gave her a panic attack. It was not the first time. I learned from a psychology lecture that bipolar disorder can increase a person’s blood pressure and could potentially lead to this kind of panic attack. I was sad about what happened to my friend, but I couldn’t do anything to help her. So I went to talk with my psychology teacher, and she advised me to play the piano for my friend. I did as the teacher told me, and with my music playing, Catherine was able to calm down. Music’s calming effect drives me to dive into how music can release people from their traumas and help them step out of their experiences. I asked my teacher about the power of music, and she told me about music therapy. She even introduced me to a Music Therapy program in Sabah, Malaysia. With great interest, I attended the program last summer and learned about basic music therapy with the local music therapist. The most memorable concept that I was taught is tuning in—patients and the therapist reach a musical harmony in melody and pitch. When practicing tuning in, I came to realize that music therapy uses music as a form of communication to guide patients to express their feelings. Without verbal communication, people use different instruments and tones to play harmonious music with a beautiful melody and perfect pitch. Tuning-in also means using different melodies and rhythms to stimulate different human emotions and to help music therapists understand patients’ traumas. When you heard that I will attend the program in Malaysia, you didn’t support me because you were concerned about my safety. However, I actually learned a lot during those music therapy workshops. I really hope that you can understand my wish and support my decisions in the future. Best, Mary Thanks for reading! Have you signed up for our online CBT learning course yet? San the QR code above to join us learning together about cognitive behavioral therapy via WeChat and Future Learn.

As part of our ongoing work with schools and colleges in Beijing, CandleX held a workshop on 29 May in collaboration with Elite Scholars of China. The workshop aimed to teach parents whose children were about to graduate high school and go abroad for college what they could expect from their children’s mental health during the transition, how they could support them, and how they can support themselves through this time. While schools usually do a great job of making the transition from high school to university easier on students, the needs of the parents often go ignored. During this period of transition, parents go from actively raising a child to being the parent of an adult who is no longer home and might be thousands of miles away. CandleX is proud to partner with Elite Scholars of China to provide a workshop for these parents that discusses how the transition to college in the US can affect their children emotionally, and how they can take care of their own emotional well-being. Different from previous workshops that CandleX have run on this topic, this workshop was led by the parents’ needs and wants rather than by the planned content. Alongside advice about caring for teenage children as they leave the family home and how to spot signs of mental health issues, the workshop focused on giving parents various different tools to cope with the sudden changes they would be facing, such as meditation and breathing exercises. Because a lot of parents expressed a feeling of anxiety as they thought of their children venturing out into the world, coming back to their breath and finding their center proved to be a valuable tool. In fact, Xiaojie Qin, the workshop facilitator, came back to the breathing exercises three times throughout the session. By the third time, the participants were completely absorbed in the breathing exercises. Parents were advised to honor the feelings surrounding this new transition and to address them appropriately. The parents were also able to see the results of a similar student workshop, where students (their children） were asked, in the event of any emotional distress, if they would reach out to their parents. Parents were pleased to find that 42% of students said that they would definitely contact their parents in such a situation, and 26% said they were “very likely” to do the same. The workshop experience proved to be an enriching one and one that CandleX hopes to continue providing to parents. For more of Candle X’s tools to help parents with these transitions, please see the resources at the bottom of the page. If you have ideas or comments about our mental health services, or want to attend a workshop, send an e-mail to info@candlex.cn and we will get back to you. On 29 June, CandleX is hosting a Launch Party for our flagship Project, Moodlab, at Camera Stylo. Scan the QR code to buy a ticket! #mentalhealth #depression #bipolardisorder #Beijing #China #psychosocialsupport #events #mentalhealthforteens

MoodlaB. #Bipolar. #BeBrave. #BeStrong. Just #BeYourself. MoodlaB is the award-winning photo and story series from CandleX, Bearapy and Pere Ibañez featuring models living in Beijing whose lives have been touched by bipolar disorder. From 29 June at Camera Stylo, the photos will be displayed for the first time ever in China. We can’t wait to show off our photos, our stories and our community – so use the QR code below or on the poster to buy your ticket to the Launch party! Where? Camera Stylo, 64 Dongsi Shiyi Tiao, Dongcheng District, Beijing（东城区东四十一条64号） When? 6.30pm til late How much? Your RMB60 ticket (paid via the QR code or on the door) will get you one free drink. Payment will mean you are registered with your wechat account, so just show your account name at the door to get in. To pay, scan this QR code: What? Photos and visuals from Pere Ibañez featuring models from Beijing’s bipolar community; stories by Enoch Li, founder of Bearapy; a panel discussion on the project and its impact on the community; and a raffle with loads of exciting prizes donated from some of Beijing’s most iconic businesses. For CandleX, the Moodlab project has always been more than just an art project. It is a way for people in Beijing who have been affected by bipolar disorder to come together, shake off the stigma associated with bipolar disorder, and connect with likeminded people. The project started back in September 2016, and the photographs have already been exhibited around the world, been shortlisted for and won several competitions, and been published in magazines and articles – but this is the first time that they will be shown in Beijing, and accompanied by personal stories from the models themselves. This event will be a chance to celebrate the CandleX community, meet old friends and mingle with some new faces, and meet the photographer and some of the models behind the award-winning photo series. We will also have a panel discussion where some of the people associated with the project will share their experiences and what getting involved has meant to them. You’ll get a free drink with your ticket and the bar will be open all night. We also have a raffle with lots of amazing prizes generously donated by some of your favourite Beijing brands. Raffle tickets will be for sale at RMB30 for 1 or RMB50 for 2. To donate to the fund to turn the photos and stories into a book, click ‘Read more’ or scan the QR code below. Click on here to find out more about the MoodlaB project and to read some of our inspiring stories. #mentalhealth #depression #bipolardisorder #Beijing #Moodlab #onemodelonestory #events