Mental health issues are ubiquitous. That’s the message Xiaojie’s making known to the world. In May 2018, Xiaojie joined a journalist from the China Development Brief to discuss her work with CandleX, her views on mental health, and the importance behind understanding it for the benefit of the community. Besides introducing her purpose behind the founding of CandleX, she also explained some ongoing CandleX activities: community workshops, art campaigns, public education and more. CandleX is proud to have had the opportunity to gain yet another media platform to further our influence and works in the local Beijing community. For the full story, please click “Xiaojie Qin: Mental Health Concerns Everyone” . #CandleX #China #Beijing

Halcyon Days This month (December 2018), we have an upcoming exhibition in the LACD Los Angeles Center for Digital Art with this “Halcyon Days “photo from our MoodLab Project. Since the first photo was exhibited in 2016, our effort to campaign for bipolar disorder awareness continues. This photo marked the 8th time that we participated in the art exhibition. The Moodlab Project kicked off in September 2016, with the core element of our photoshoot featuring community members whose lives are affected by bipolar disorder. As part of 9 elements, this is the foundation of this project, which uses art to create a space for conversation, courage, and community connection as well as bringing people with bipolar disorder out of the darkness. We are partnering with Pere Ibanez (www.pereinbanez.com), a renound artist from Spain, to invite people into our studio for a photography session, and to learn their individual stories. 2 years have passed and we have taken the time to connect with the community members. We have completed 24 photo shoots and released 5 personal stories of the model in partnership with Berapy. Pere Ibanez released his newest book “Syzygy” in December 2017 with all productions from the Moodlab project, which became a best-selling book on iTunes. Some of the photos have won world awards that we are very proud of. Throughout the years, our photos have made into exhibitions around the world, been featured in magazine and newspaper, and spread the awareness of bipolar disorder. It is not just a photoshoot, but a process for the participants to be able to step up and advocate for bipolar disorder. These are people at our dinner table, but with a story that you might not know. Each photo is a symbol that no one should be alone. Each photo is a triumph, where we all can have a voice, even if it shakes us. Here are the personal stories of the models from Moodlab Project, and there will be more to come: ·Partner in this Whole Ordeal ·Safe Space ·Care Less ·Where the Sun and the Moon Meet (One Model One Story | World Mental Health Day) ·Going with My Mind With this in mind, we invite you to engage with the pictures and hear the voices from each picture. We encourage you to keep an open mind as you might hear different things from these pictures. Here’s a quick review of the photos we’ve released: Best of Photography 2017 Official Selection by Photographer's Forum and Serbin Press, USA Community Engagement Furthermore, it is important to note that this project is not for us or about us, but for all of the participants, the Beijing community, and the people beyond it. We hope that the courage and the openness of the models, who are your colleagues, friends, or just passers-by, will inspire you as well. We wish to invite you, the community members, in promotion and community engagement of Moodlab. We encourage you to speak out about mental health in your circles and share the news about our project. This way you will also become a part of the campaign, which will then reach more people and raise the awareness in China and beyond. If you want to talk to us about being engaged with MoodLab, reach us at: info@candlex.cn Moodlab Emotional Wellbeing workshop at UCCA, Dec 2016 You Can Share and Inspire Social Media Follow. Like. Share and re-share once again. From our WeChat account to the photographer Pere Ibañez's Facebook page, there are plenty of ways. The best way to get the latest updates and share the news with your friends is on the Facebook wall, Instagram feed, or WeChat moments. Be our guest! Speak about it online and offline. Do not be afraid of raising mental health awareness everywhere you are, as that is the best way to reduce the taboo and increase the general knowledge! Fundraising Recently, we have opened an account on Zhongchou to raise funds for the ultimate goal of the Moodlab Project - the Art Book for Bipolar Disorder Education, which will include selected photos, stories of the models, and educational information on bipolar disorder. We would be immensely grateful if you shared the link with your friends to help us get the needed financial resources! At the same time, if you have a WeChat Wallet account, you can directly support us on our platform. #Beijingdepression #Chinadepression #bipolardisorder #Moodlab #mentalhealth

September 10th marks World Suicide Prevention Day, a global awareness raising event observed to honour commitment and action to preventing suicide. Last year in Beijing, CandleX Founder Xiaojie and Peer Support Group Project Coordinator Alice Liu commemorate this important day for mental health awareness and depression awareness with an appearance on an English speaking radio show, Touch Beijing 感受北京, online and on AM774/FM 92.3, on 10th September 2018. Hosts Chloe and Kat (below) introduced Xiaojie and Alice in the interview segment of their show, after sharing some personal stories about their experiences on mental health. Xiaojie, CandleX’s Founder and Director, explained her motivations for starting the organization and need for a platform for the international community in Beijing to raise awareness of, and provide psychosocial care for, mental health issues such as depression or bipolar. Xiaojie and Alice have both health with their personal mental health issues, and it is this that allows them access to a deeper understanding of the need for support; They were both given space on the show to explain their personal motivations, and to answer for commonly held misconceptions or misunderstandings about mental illness, peer-to peer support, and the healing process. Alice, who has been a member of the peer support group, opened up about her nerves and even reluctance before joining, and continued struggles with mental illness. As for Xiaojie （above）, she was able to share statistics from CandleX’s peer support group 3rd year Review Report and anecdotes about the history of CandleX, as well as her own personal story. We are grateful for Touch Beijing for this opportunity to promote CandleX’s message. Listen to the show again here: http://www.am774.com/hf/2018-09/10/cms891839article.shtml Did you listen to the radio show? Let us know what you think by email: info@candlex.cn #Chinadepression #psychosocialsupport #mentalsupportgroup #suicideprevention #peersupportgroup #support #suicide #depression #bipolar

10 September was World Suicide Prevention Day and CandleX marked this important day by running a Suicide Prevention Campaign since then until now. In September, CandleX and thebeijinger joined together to raise awareness on suicide prevention. CandleX was featured in a short article in thebeijinger published on 10 September about mental health options in Beijing. An anonymous member of the CandleX support group discussed their experiences and shared their own advice for talking to people who are struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts: “Listen and don’t panic. My ability to talk about my experience, and the fact I consider myself someone who is successfully managing mental illness, stems from a support network, with who I can talk freely about my feelings without judgment.” Click https://www.thebeijinger.com/blog/2019/09/10/suicide-awareness-week-know-your-options-mental-well-being-beijing to read the full article in Thebeijinger. #mentalhealth #depression #bipolardisorder #Beijing #China #psychosocialsupport #suicideprevention

To mark World Mental Health Day 2019, CandleX Founder Xiaojie Qin and support group participant Lindsay were featured on English Language radio show Touch Beijing. Go to “Read more” and listen at 35 minutes and 35 seconds to listen to the full interview. Or listen to it here. Part of CandleX’s goal is to raise awareness of issues related to mental health in Beijing. This year, World Mental Health Day on 10 October provided an opportunity to do just that. Founder and Director Xiaojie Qin, in her second appearance on the network, andpeer support groupparticipant and American ex-pat Lindsay joined hosts Gail and Yige Wang (王异戈) on Touch Beijing, the afternoon drive home show on Radio Beijing International. Lindsay opened up about their experiences, candidly discussing the role culture, language and identity can play in mental health. They expressed optimism with respect to the evolving dialogue around mental health in China and abroad. Xiaojie, as the lead facilitator of the CandleX peer support group, spoke of the key role that peer-support can play in maintaining your mental health. For Americans like Lindsay or other ex-pats living in Beijing, it can be hard to find an understanding community to talk about mental health – and as Xiaojie added, the same can be true for returning Chinese people that have spent a long time overseas and learned to express themselves in a certain way in English. She outlined the key role that having the support group in English plays for many participants. CandleX’ s peer support group now happens every week on Tuesdays – follow the links in our weekly Wechat post to sign up. As Xiaojie explained in the radio show, it is not a replacement for professional help, but is designed to be complementary to it – a non-judgemental space where participants can vent, discuss or simply listen. CandleX remains committed to now happens every week on Tuesdays – follow the links in our weekly Wechat post to sign up. As Xiaojie explained in the radio show, it is not a replacement for professional help but is designed to be complementary to it – a non-judgemental space where participants can vent, discuss or simply listen.

She’s been behind each event that we have hosted this year. As a community outreach assistant, Rachel Bernstein has made herself an absolute asset to our CandleX team. She has given countless hours to this organization and the Beijing community. It has been a pleasure to have her on the team and she has made a huge contribution. Now this May, she's moving back to the United States. We are sad to see her leave, but we give her our best wishes as she begins this new chapter in life. Let’s hear what she says about working with CandleX. Hi everyone, my name is Rachel Bernstein. I am a 19-year-old American living in Beijing, China. A few months ago, I decided I would like to work in Beijing and learn what it would be like to live (and work) in the real world, oy vey! So, for the past few months I have been working as the Community Outreach Assistant for CandleX. CandleX is an amazing organization and has taught me so much. I have accomplished tasks such as: writing articles for CandleX, being on-site support for both the free community events and the charity events where I was able to improve my public speaking skills, I was also able to improve my camera skills by taking photos at each event, I learnt to create appealing posters, IEC’s, movies, etc., and even got to practice my Chinese as I made my way around Beijing looking for places to hang up our posters. Xiaojie and Rachel out in Ritan Park for work I have enjoyed the work immensely. It is a fairly new NGO, its one-year anniversary was in April, and therefore, the work tends to be demanding. However, there is always support from coworkers. Rachel's first Psychiatric Group Home Visit with the team Even though the work is a bit demanding, it is always extremely rewarding. Working for an NGO that supports mental illnesses will always make you feel like you are helping someone out, no matter what the current assignment you are working on is. Rachel giving an overview of CandleX meditation workshop Besides events held within Beijing, CandleX is purely run on computers, which is great because you can work from home, from a café, anywhere. Working with CandleX means you set your own schedule and this means that if you are working a full time job, you can still work with CandleX. Also, if you are like me, taking a year off and looking for a job that will give you experience, you can work with CandleX and still have time to tour around Beijing and even travel outside of it. Rachel having dinner with Xiaojie, first time that we didn’t work while hanging out. I am heading home to America so that I can start my university education, and this means I am sadly leaving CandleX. I wish them all the best in the future!

CandleX is recruiting! Find out more and how to apply – find the answers to all your questions below! What is CandleX? CandleX is a mental health focused organization promoting awareness for depression and bipolar disorder in Beijing. Additionally, we provide psychosocial support to the international community residing in Beijing. For more info, check out our website: www.candlex.cn. Who are we looking for? We are looking for a wide range or hardworking, enthusiastic people with a range of different skills. Most of the people we are looking for don’t need any specific experience, just some spare time, the ability to learn fast and a passion for mental health – so get in touch! If we think you might be a good fit, we can create a JD together based on the overlap between your interests and the needs of the organization. Example areas of work Social Media – remote work writing, editing and posting stories and updates on our social media pages. We regularly publish inspiring and relatable stories from the Beijing community, including our popular Teens Open Letter series, so if you are a writer, then we are looking for you. Community Outreach – mainly based in Beijing, this work involved working on community events and partnerships. Recent events include workshops on mental health in the workplace and longstanding partnerships with international schools. Technical Team – qualified counsellors, paid for their expertise, attend events, mentor participants or carry out workshops online or in person. The samples in these past articles might give you some inspiration of the kind of roles we are looking for: https://www.candlex.cn/join-us/ but remember, everyone’s experience levels are different. If you have specific ideas of projects, we would love to hear them! What can we offer you? Personal growth is our key principle. We believe a volunteer organization that gives space for personal development will grow naturally. Since we can’t offer regular remuneration with the exception of our technical team, we hope volunteering with CandleX will be as rewarding as possible. How can I apply? Hey lucy you didn't send me the qr code that's supposed to be here If you aren’t already familiar with CandleX, we recommend you follow our Wechat account, join our public group by scanning the QR code below or come to an event or two to get familiar with what we do. After that, there are four simple steps: 1. Send in a CV and short Cover Letter outlining your experience and interests, along with the full PDF results of https://discpersonalitytesting.com/free-disc-test/ (choose "take a free disc test") to info@candlex.cn. 2. An interview with your potential new manager (via phone or face to face) 3. A probation period of two months will allow us to further define your role together and set expected outcomes from your time with the organization. 4. Formally join CandleX. We are looking forward to hearing from you – contact us at info@candlex.cn with your information!

Did you know that one in six people with mental health conditions is aged 10-19 years? According to the World Health Organization (WHO), suicide is the 4th leading cause of death in 15-19-year-olds. Mental health conditions account for 16% of the global burden of disease and injury in people aged 10-19 years. The consequences of not addressing teens mental health conditions extend to adulthood, impairing both physical and mental health and limiting opportunities to lead fulfilling lives as adults (1). For this reason, CandleX places a strong emphasis on supporting teens and has an ongoing project targeted towards helping them: the Teens Empowerment Project. The CandleX Teens Empowerment Project started in 2020 in Beijing, China under Teens Mental Health Program. We target teenagers who are usually third-cultured, international, and multilingual. These are teens who have experience with mental illness, such as depression, bipolar disorder, eating disorder, and so on. Some of them have also experienced self-harm. The goal of the project is to reduce the stigma attached to mental illness and provide a chance for teens to gain knowledge on mental health and tools on how to cope with difficult emotions so that they become resilient. The Teens Empowerment Project has 3 stages. Stage 1 is called “Teen Writers.” The teens write down their own stories with support from a therapist. This process allows teens to find their own voice and explore the struggles and the meaning of their stories. This is like the narrative approach that we take in psychotherapy. Later, the therapist can identify the dominant and problematic story. We also include facts and insight into the editor's notes for professional information. Once we publish that through our own platform and the networks of our media partners, we can help to educate the community and reduce the stigma that teenagers feel is attached to mental illness. Stage 2 is called “Teen Interviewers.” The teens have the chance to interview an influential adult in our community. It might be a startup entrepreneur or the CEO of a well-established company. These are adults who have battled with mental health in the past and are willing to talk to the teens about their experiences. We work with experienced media professionals who volunteer to help the teens structure their interviews, prepare the articles, and write the final pieces. Again, there is a therapist engaged in the process to make sure the whole process is therapeutic and that the final piece serves as a mental health educational purpose. These first two stages allow teenagers to learn how to accept their own struggles and become stronger in dealing with them. They also gain practical skills associated with publishing articles and conducting interviews. For a lot of them, it's also the first time that they publish something on a public platform! Stage 3 is called “Teen Spokesperson.” CandleX gets interviewed by the media every now and then, and as the Teens Empowerment Project develops, we try to create a space for the teenagers to be the people who can talk about their opinions and their experiences as an advocate as well. So far, we've had teens on radio shows, magazines, and now we have an exciting opportunity for them to be on national TV as well! The three-stage empowerment project paints a road map where we can take the teenager on a journey. Not all teenagers will go through all the stages; it depends on their willingness, strength, and preferences. That’s why we take very small steps in this process. We constantly check in with them to see how they're feeling, whether they're learning things and whether things are going according to what they expect. Our role in this process is being the support instead of the supervisor. To empower one teen, we often engage 4 to 5 adults in the process. So far, this is the highest investment project we've had in all our projects. It usually takes about 6 months to 1 year to finish the empowerment project for one teenager. This is also one of the strongest programs we have, where I continue to see changes that teenagers demonstrate throughout the process, as well as after the program has ended. Some of them choose to stay with CandleX and volunteer in other roles, while others continue with their lives and contribute to society in their own ways on mental health afterward. References: 1. Adolescent Mental Health - World Health Organization. https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/adolescent-mental-health.

Self-harm or suicide attempts are attempts taken to ease the pain and to respond to extreme despair, symptoms often experienced by people with major depression. This story could be triggering to some, and reader’s discretion is advised. To understand the life events that contributed to this story, please read Chapter 1: “Crushed and Misunderstood” on the author’s arrival to Canada again at the age of 13. Author: Katelyn (pseudo name) Written in 2020 I didn’t dare open my eyes. I thought to myself, so this is it . I was covered with a blanket, and the ambulance worker beside me took my blood pressure. I was rushed to the hospital, the doctor shined a light into my pupils to check if I was still conscious. They attempted to wake me up by performing a series of physical stimulations. I was fully aware of my surroundings and felt the sharp pain that everything had caused me. The simple act of lifting my eyelids and letting light in was the last thing I could do. The nurse then forced open my mouth. One hand pinched my cheeks while the other hand pressed a tongue depressor so hard until I gagged. I felt blinded by the beaming surgical lights. “Wow, where did you learn that trick?” The nurse beside her was impressed. That night, I had what would be the first of my many therapy sessions. I anxiously waited in the room, until one man walked in with a calm and serene presence. He sat down and we stared at each other in silence. “My dear, you look really, really sad.” The words gently echoed in the room. The last tight nerve that I was holding onto finally broke. All the emotions that I’d been bottling up over the last few months erupted at the same time. The sadness, the guilt, the shame, the hate and the hopelessness all turned into uncontrollable streams of tears. I lowered my head, shivering and sobbing, wanting to curl into a ball, unable to speak. Finally , I thought. The world that expects so much of me will have an answer. I can rest now. When I woke up the next morning, I found myself alone on a hospital bed. I turned my head and saw sunlight for the first time in months. I quietly observed the room I was in. It was cleaned spotless, and a giant window overlooked me where I could see the busy hospital staff. The bathroom was covered in steel and metal, and so was the toilet. Just like in prison , I noted to myself. Even the mirror wasn’t made of glass but some sort of shiny reflective material – unbreakable, of course. I soon learned that even plastic knives were locked away. Every morning, we used spoons to spread jam on our toast. Over my week-long stay, I had countless appointments with psychologists and psychiatrists. “You have depression. Major depressive disorder, to be more exact,” Dr. Elizabeth said. This was not the first time I’d heard the term, though it was the first time I’d been diagnosed with it. I learned that my school was wrong, and that I’d been suffering from depression for a long time. “Don’t worry, depression is treatable,” Dr. Elizabeth assured me. The psychiatrists then prescribed me SSRIs, a type of antidepressant, though to this day I have yet to find one that works for me. Experiences of being discriminated and marginalized can cause intense emotional pain for children. In a state of major depression, children sometimes resort to self-harm or suicide to ease or end the emotional pain. According to WHO (2020), Suicide is the second leading cause of death in 15-29-year-olds (1). This type of behavior is sometimes hidden. Therefore, it is important to recognize symptoms of depression and seek professional help. If the child resents going to school, becomes irritable, depressed, loses interest in the things they usually like, changes in appetite, experiences sleep problems or significant fatigue, these symptoms may be related to depression. Although Katelyn has not found the right mix of medication, it’s worth being noted that many do respond to anti-depressants, which gives patients the space and energy to work effectively on their fundamental underlying psychological problems, usually through counselling. According to WHO (2020), for major depression, Antidepressants can be an effective form of treatment for moderate-severe depression, however, they are not the first line of treatment in adolescents, among whom they should be used with extra caution (1). References: 1. World Health Organization, 2020, https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/depression CandleX’s Resources Are you or a friend in a Crisis? Crisis Support Your questions on mental health | CandleX Classroom https://www.candlex.cn/classroom Depression stories from our community members (both adults and teens) CandleX Column | Community Writing https://www.candlex.cn/community-writing Pretreatment CandleX Wechat Groups all ages, add our admin: niama_elazzab for 15-22 year old, add our admin: amaraprenderyya Peer Support Group biweekly meetings and biweekly hangout

The recent decades have remarkably changed how people view mental illness, particularly depression and anxiety. However, there is still stigma around it. Comes with it is the battle many of us fight alone, in silos. After her discharge from the psychiatric department, she then was faced with the battle of living with a condition but having to cover it up. To understand the life events that contributed to this story, please read Chapter 1: “Crushed and Misunderstood” on the author’s arrival to Canada again at the age of 13, and ‘Chapter 2: Depression is Treatable, Doctor Said’ on her hospitalization. Author: Katelyn (pseudo name) Written in 2020 “You’ve been gone for so long! What happened to you! Cancer?” Brooke’s eyes lit up when she saw me, as she practically flew across the hallway. Her tone was accusative but I could see the corners of her mouth curling up. “Ha, something like that,” I tried to brush it off. I never told people about my depression. I was afraid they would misunderstand me and see me as weak or crazy. It’s not as straightforward as breaking a bone, after all. Almost no one knew about my mental illness in the new English school I’d been attending for grade 10. The school agreed to let me skip grade 9 after I was assessed. I was no longer a year behind my peers. Even then, I was well aware of the stigmatization around mental illness, probably because so much of what I’d experienced was internalized. I did tell one girl there about my depression, but that’s because she was depressed too. “Someone so bubbly and outgoing like Brooke wouldn’t understand,” I thought bitterly, determined to not let anyone find out about why I was away for a month. I became a regular at the mental health department for teenagers in my local hospital. I’d just been discharged from my longest period of hospitalization. We had established very clearly that suicide was off the table, but I just felt like I was stuck in a never-ending hellish purgatory. I would go to school for a week then stop for a few days, and the cycle would repeat. Needless to say, I didn’t get good grades, which made me feel ashamed and worthless. By the end of grade 10, I lived every day drowning in hatred, directed both towards myself and to the world I lived in. Every breath I took felt like a reminder of how much of a failure I was, and I wanted to end everything. “Why don’t you come with me to China, where you can start afresh and have a change of scenery?” my dad suggested, glancing at me surreptitiously, searching for signs of agreement on my face. I was a bit taken aback by the suggestion. I turned my head and saw my reflection through the glass window: greasy hair from not taking a shower for weeks, a scrawny silhouette from microwaved ramen at midnight, her stare weary and spiteful. I resented this image of her, and I wanted desperately to be that happy and carefree girl again. In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, it is believed that the avoidance of experiences distracts us from living a fulfilled life. That means, our pursuit of happiness as a goal to avoid all other normal feelings including sadness, frustration, disappointment, anger in life could hinder our mental wellbeing, quite counter-intuitively.[1] That being said, as a parent, your attitude towards feelings is ultimately important. Are you able to accept the whole range of emotions as they arise, and not just happiness? Your children are the most imminent people that are influenced by your attitudes. As a society, we have co-created the compelling concept through advertisement, social media illusions that lasting happiness is the goal of life. What’s your experience in pursuing that goal? Fortunately, we have also seen an exploding trend of mindfulness practice, which helps us stay intuitive and embrace our feelings regardless. Whether you are a parent, a teenager, a teacher, or someone who builds a community, it is important to ask the question: what attitude do I have towards emotions, and how does that attitude unfold in my daily operation as an individual? References: 1. Hays, S. C. & Strosahl. K. D., (2004). A Practical Guide to Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. Springer.

Mental illnesses are often seen as short-lived, singular events, from which we move on as soon as we see signs of recovery. In fact, healing takes time and support is needed. Like any major life event, mental illness leaves a mark and becomes a part of us. There have been increasing discussions around the diagnoses of mental illnesses; however, what remains after the initial stages of the battle is not discussed enough. How does one continue to support a mental illness survivor? What does the healing process look like? Katelyn bravely and openly shares with us her story. To understand the life events that contributed to this story, please read the previous three chapters: Chapter 1: “Crushed and Misunderstood” on the author’s arrival to Canada again at the age of 13, Chapter 2: “Depression is Treatable, Doctor Said” on her hospitalization, and Chapter 3: “Stuck in the Purgatory” on a continual journey after leaving the hospital. Author: Katelyn (pseudo name) Written in 2020 Now if this was a movie, this would be the part where I learned a bunch of life lessons and found my happily ever after. I landed in Beijing with so much excitement and hope, enrolled in an international school with the thought of forgetting everything that had happened, as if it was all just a bad dream. I would start clean and fresh, make new friends, get good grades, graduate from high school and move on to college. This illusion was soon shattered as I learned that depression is deeply ingrained in my brain. It is always creeping around, every thought and every action shadowed by this growing and immovable force. Depression feasted on my pursuit of perfectionism and on my fear of failure. With every passing day, I grew more paranoid, more insecure. After four months as a junior in high school, the new environment completely burned me out. I began to lose all sense of time. I dropped out of school and lived every day like a zombie. I wasn’t entirely alive but wasn’t dead either. I was losing the war with depression, so I tried my best to conceal and numb my feelings. As I lay hopeless on my bed, in the darkness of my room full of laundry and litter, I saw no possible future in which I could live a happy and meaningful life. “Breathe in, two, three, four, breathe out, two, three, four.” My stomach rose and fell in sync with the soothing voice of the guided meditation. As I meditated deeper, I could feel the fogginess in my brain disappear, unveiling a serene and peaceful sensation that I rarely feel. As someone who’s been in countless therapy sessions, I am familiar with CBT, DBT and meditation. I never gave the latter a try though, until recently when a long-time family friend passionately introduced me to it, believing it would benefit me. She said it helped her recover from her brain injury after a car crash. And she was right. Before I never dared to take a deep look at my thoughts and my feelings, afraid I would give in to depression. Meditation is merely a form of guidance, gently casting a beacon of light, scaring the shadows and darkness away to reveal the scared little lone girl. She only begs for forgiveness and love, and I vowed to take care of her. “HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY!” My family shouted in glee, the warm candlelight on the birthday cake giving their faces a soft glow in the dark. I smiled, thanking them for their support, and blew out the candles. It’s been two years since I last went to regular school. I’m homeschooled and do online classes now. I’ve been going to therapy every week, taking my meds as prescribed and trying to maintain a healthy diet and sleep schedule. My pondering nature often blurs the line between sadness and depression, but I’ve started to appreciate my unique view of the world. I still have a long way to go in my recovery, and I have yet to know my place and meaning in the universe. But this will be a colorful journey that I’ll cherish dear to my heart, because I know I will always have the love of my family, my friends and myself. Right now, the tranquil night is transforming into a dreamy blanket for the city. The moon so shyly shimmers in the dark as I hear my pet hamster excitedly run on his wheel, and I’m grateful for all of these things. As I write these last words, I thank you, dear reader, for reading my story. According to the U.S. National Institute on Mental Health, nearly one-in-five adults live with a mental illness[1]. When it comes to depression, specifically, every person’s path to recovery differs. Some take a few weeks or months. But for others, depression is a long-term companion. In about 20% to 30% of people who have an episode of depression, the symptoms don't entirely go away[2]. However, many are rushed in the process of healing. It is understandable that all involving parties long for a swift recovery. But those who suffer may find it not only a difficult goal to achieve, but also a lonely battle they must fight alone. Looking on the bright side, it isn’t rare that many living with depression still find deep joy and meaning in between and sometimes during episodes of suffering. As Katelyn described, these journeys are indeed war-like; nonetheless, we must also acknowledge that there are victories despite the casualties. We recommend you to check out stories under #Emotions&Stories in the CandleX official account to further read about adults who manage to both live with depression and appreciate life for its beauty. “An Overview of Depression Recovery.” WebMD, WebMD, www.webmd.com/depression/recovery-overview. “Living Well with Serious Mental Illness.” SAMHSA, www.samhsa.gov/serious-mental-illness.

Providing mental health support to teens has been a key part of CandleX’s vision and goals. Teens, unlike other demographics, face unique mental health challenges partly due to the development phase they undergo as well as the social and cultural expectations they receive. According to the U.S.-based organization National Institute of Mental Health, 1 in 5 children ages 13 to 18 have, or will have a serious mental illness. In fact, 50% of all lifetime cases of mental illness begin by age 14.[1] Therefore, the consequences of not addressing adolescent mental health conditions extend to adulthood, impairing both physical and mental health and limiting opportunities to lead fulfilling lives as adults.[2] Since February 2020, CandleX launched a column called Teen’s Opens Letters dedicated to teens to voice their experiences. Whether it’s mental health challenges as a result of moving away from home and beginning university life in a foreign country, battles against eating disorders and depression, unspoken thoughts to parents, Teen’s Open Letters has a place for all these topics. Click here for ThatsBeijing’s recently published article on CandleX’s mental health service and support for teens. Sources: 1. National Institute of Mental Health. www.nimh.nih.gov 2. World Health Organization. https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/adolescent-mental-health